They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
I can't say "baby i'm to high to talk to you" in Starbucks.
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
So then we ended up at a bar full of navy SEALs and I got one of them to take his shirt off, then I felt him up
I feel like 31-year old me is 21-year old me's hero
Only a true best friend would remind you to make sure your cucumber dildo is organic
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
So the door man at the local dispensary started giving me motivational talks about my beard...
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
Randomize