About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
We got so high we made milksteak
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
You make shower sex sound like waterboarding
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
Last night he asked the cab driver "if you were in the middle of getting tattooed and the tattoo artist suddenly got a boner would you leave or would you get that boner??"
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
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