Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
he puts the penis in happiness.
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
Life lesson #57: drinking whisky out of apples leads to threesomes.
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
You know we had a good night last night when today I opened up my Google Translate application and the language is set to Persian and the phrase to translate is "I want you to suck my dick".
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
I took out the emergency phone in the elevator and replaced it with a bottle of vodka. The game is simple, do a shot for the number of the floor you're going to. Best suggestion box tip ever.
Should we go get some celebratory "I'm not pregnant" tacos?
Randomize
