why didn't you poke me back
We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
Riding home in a carseat. Worst. Night. Ever.
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
hey, you wanna get together over coffee or something?
is this code for 'i just got broke up with and i need a sympathy dicking'?
how did you know?
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
The second I see you we're shot gunning beers
It's gonna be 8 o'clock in the morning
And your point is?
Marry me
I wish I could have seen the drive thru woman's face after " May I please have 20 Mcflurrys.....and a large diet coke, I'm trying to watch my weight for bikini season."
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
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