im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
I just got my beard fondled by a drunk chick outside the venue. I feel slightly violated. And I think her boyfriend wanted to fight me.
I woke up to a quacking alarm clock and a rando in my bed. I told him I liked his cargo shorts. Fireball is not my soulmate anymore.
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
You know it's really hard to draft fantasy football players in a crowded bar when I have a raging hard on
My brothers dog was hit by a car and died. They're really sad about it.
But they're having a baby! It's like a dog only 40 billion times worse!
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
