Kiss
Puke
I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
This is your morning news. Today at 5 pm I will be going out of town until the 29th. If you would like some great sex before I leave, please contact me. The available packages are: a house call, an outdoor excursion, or a delivery style in-car quickie. available only while supplies last.
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
I was all, oh. I've had tattoos and broken a limb. Waxing my lady parts will be a cake walk. I was wrong.
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
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