where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
At first I was confused when I woke up with shards of glass and pickle brine in my pants. But then I remembered I hung out with you last night.
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
your phone died, so you started bawling in the bar
yeah that sounds like me
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
I brought an already opened bag of trail mix from home to snack on today. Some motherfucker ate all the m&ms out of it. I hate my roommates
So I had this brilliant idea that I would sleep in all sorts of sweatpants and sweatshirts... Apparently I thought I could "sweat" off the drunk in my sleep and that it would make me feel better when I woke up
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
i havent showered for 4 days and i just made my dog smell my arm pit. also, im stoned.
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