well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
That's why my New Years resolution was no more blondes. They're all bad news
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
Randomize
