yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
Just donated money to a kid for her softball team.
Obviously I'm trying to futher our next generation of lesbians. I may be hitting on her at the gay bar in ten years...
I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
drunk me just left notes all around the apt to remind shitfaced me that i have mashed potatoes in the fridge. do not take them down if you come home before me.
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
She's not a foreskin expert like you
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
Apparently karate chopping the fronts off all the paper towel and soap dispensers in the bathrooms isn't even frowned upon. Like even at the third bar when I fell flat on my back trying to jump kick the last one some guy just helped me up and high fived me. America.
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
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