you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
I blacked out after you got about 8 goldfish out of the tank and put them in your pockets. We're not allowed back. It was a sucky Walmart anyway...
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
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