69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
I think you'll appreciae more than anyone that I'm renting my parking spot out for a half gallon of vodka a month.
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
I feel like the universe head butted me in my balls. That hungover.
.... My lady balls. Cuz I'm a lady.
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
Randomize
