I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
Im sitting alone watching titanic. Drunk. Without pants. Holding a fishing pole. Im pretty sure im okay with all of this.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
Oh shit. The hangover. It has taken 20 mins and 5 attempts to tie my shoelaces
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
I did it again.
I drunk texted John McCain.
Randomize
