Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
Well this lady at the bar told me I was a natural on the tambourine and that it was my God given talent. and then she gave me a tambourine.
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
What's a really polite way of saying "you have gravely overestimated the value of your vagina?"
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
Randomize
