I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
Shit ive learned: when going out to a party, always wear a bathing suit underneath just in case theres a pool with a roof next to it
The people at subway are so judgy when you stop to get a sandwhich on your walk of shame
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
If you had a good reason for throwing the toaster at the wall, now's a good time to tell someone. My parents are on their way back and you know my dad and his pop tarts.
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
Randomize
