Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
Went to 3 separate liquor stores today and I just made a huge tray of jello shots. This will be the Thanksgiving that puts all the others to shame.
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
I was going through my settings and the phone randomly started playing "Crazy Little Thing Called Love" by Dwight Yoakum. Out loud. At full volume. I was shitting. There were 3 other people in the bathroom. I love iOS 7.
Please tell me that I didn't call you to say I was swimming in outter space
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
there is another microwave in the elevator.
He asked me to describe my life outside work. I responded with "Home-wrecker.
Randomize