He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
Randomize
