Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
you kept trying to make scrambled eggs with 3 hardboiled ones.
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
Wanna tell me why vodka seeped out of the memory foam when I climbed into my bed?
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
Randomize
