If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
I'd like to request an "its my birthday discount", and for you to bartend shirtless tonight ;)
who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly
seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
I think my moral compass just broke
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
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