I want to have your abortion
When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
Randomize
