Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
My farts woke her up so I pretended to be keep sleeping.
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
That was an excessively violent trivia night
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
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