Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
you know your drunk when 7 soccer players cant catch up to a tranny in high heels who just stole your wallet
ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
who knew i was capable of sobriety and human-like emotions all in the same night?
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
You know how I said I hit my head so hard I saw two of him and tried to make out with both? Well, it turns out he has a twin.
Randomize
