angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
i just sent my parents are gone come over I have condoms to my mom because Derek changed my numbers while I was passed out
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
I vaguely remember a pregnant lady reaching for my penis. When was I in an elevator?
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
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