Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
I wish the iPhone would register texts from 11:59 as "Last Year" instead of "Yesterday."
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
I always ask when they're due. It's the nicest way for me to let her know the rest of the world can tell she's putting on weight too
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
Randomize
