so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
I just watched a trucker jack off to a picture of Ellen DeGeneres at a truck stop in Nebraska.
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
girl in front of me at starbucks just ordered 7 shots of espresso in her latte. welcome to finals week
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
Please say a prayer for the elevator people at work today. My farts are significantly more potent the day after hitting that korean place for lunch...
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
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