And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
imagine a blue Jetta with an ILLINOIS license plate that read JISLORD..... upon pondering it for 10minutes I came to the conclusion that J stood for JESUS and IF the license plate had enough room it would read "Jesus Is Lord"
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
Randomize
