Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
Whatever, you're gonna have to break it to mom that the reason I was so drunk at Christmas dinner is because she wouldn't stop asking me why I don't have a boyfriend
I think I swiped left on my soulmate
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
Randomize
