his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
Why is there a cash register on top of my car?
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
So I forgot to ask, how was that bartender you slept with two weeks ago?
Google chlamydia.
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
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