Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
I'm going to use my one free fuck up card tonight.
What'd you do?
Its more like what im about to do.
Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
Apparently tackling a bar stool and crashing to the floor while yelling for 6 shots of whiskey won't get you thrown out on St Pattys Day.
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
My Sexting was not on an AP level
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
Randomize
