Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
A hangover is a type of food poisoning. Makes me feel better about calling out of work.
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Randomize
