we have officially lost it.
I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
well you can't waste a boner
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
She even gives head with a lisp.
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you?
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
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