Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
I have vodka and explosives. For once, we can blow something up that isn't a blow-up doll.
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
Randomize
