I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
You okay?
I walked into work with a banana and a loaf of bread
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
Randomize
