I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
Whyyyyy do my fingers smell like Chinese food.
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
The bend and snap? 98% success rate of getting attention. When used appropriately, it has an 83% rate of return on a dinner invitation.
So I found out me and this guy I was drinking beer with tonight both got lactated on by the same stripper. We're milk brothers.
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
Randomize
