Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
mondays should just be called national damage control day
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
how is it that I keep meeting up with you when Im drunk?
you stand on my porch screaming my name until I come out with you...
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
Randomize
