i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
We don't watch enough power rangers
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
I just set an alarm for 5 am tomorrow morning titled "Wake and Bake Its Christmas motherfucker"
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
Oh god I just had an orgasim riding my bike. I need to get laid pronto.
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
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