do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
Ever have the mailman look at you like youre a chronic masterbator. I have.
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
I chugged vodka from a 15 ft snorkel. What the fuck did you do with your life today?
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
There is no amount of alcohol that can make me forget I had a Jimmy Kimmel sex dream
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
Can't talk, ducks in the car
He stood up through the sunroof yelling "CHOCOLATE MILK BITCHESSSS!!!! YOU AIN'T WORTH SHIT NOW!!!" the sad part is he wasn't even drunk yet. I worry about him sometimes.
THERE HAS BEEN GRANDTHEFT IN THE HOUSE. SOMEONE STOLE THE BABYWIPES AND YOU NEED TO BUY MORE BEFORE WE LET YOU IN. oh and you have to take two shots before we'll let you in. with no chaser.
Randomize
