Your date looks like the Cloverfield monster. good luck.
My liver just broke up with me...
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
What if we had a smart house and we could just say "baked" and it would rain donuts?
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize
