Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
i wrote her a fucking poem. i better get laid for that
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
Dude I just woke up naked on the floor with my dick in a boot. Legit in a fucking boot. I also have no idea where I am.
Randomize
