i have the juiciest gold medal in my pants
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
There was confetti in my vomit this morning... Happy New Year!!
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
I just realized now that you're pregnant we can't use alcohol as currency
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
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