Where did you get a picture of my penis
I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
Really need a jack off emoji
Who do we write to about that?
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
Randomize
