Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
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