another moral hangover. fuck.
It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
i dont even know how to be here
I just washed champagne and tuna off my body. I feel like that was a successful shower.
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
Randomize
