She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
another holiday season passes without receiving a dick in a box, where did i go wrong in life?
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
There are two guys dressed like Spartans from 300 at this bar and they're making out and I needed you to know this
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
Randomize