Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
you threw up in the oven last night. i found that out after i preheated it to cook a pizza.
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
Apparently unused tampons can also double as things to bite down on during public sex to prevent screaming...
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
Eating pizza in the bath tub while watching a romantic comedy alone. I reached a new level of single.
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