Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
Just had a 10 minute long conversation with my cat about how if I died, and he needed to eat me to live, I'd totally be ok with it. Definitely still drunk.
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
STOP HOOKING UP WITH SOCCER MOMS! YOU ARE RUINING MY REPUTATION!
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
last night I used snow as a chaser
Randomize
