I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
I just shot gunned a beer for your birthday alone because you're too hungover at midnight to get out of bed. I'm not sure which of us is the bigger loser
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
Now when you said you'd never sleep with me, did you really mean never on a Monday or never without handcuffs or a blindfold or never on a airplane or never without lots of booze? Cus never is a pretty strong word.
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
Randomize
