If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
Apparently tackling a bar stool and crashing to the floor while yelling for 6 shots of whiskey won't get you thrown out on St Pattys Day.
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
Last night was the first night with all of the roommates, and what started as a calm night of light drinking got out of hand. There's a girl on my couch wearing only a fanny pack.
After so many times of carrying your puked covered clothes home in a bag on a Tuesday morning, you begin to realize that Fucked Up Mondays aren't a real thing.
Drinking Fireball means never having to say you're sorry. Unless its at you're arraignment.
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
Randomize
