I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
I though she ruined it by crying, then I realized it wasn’t a tear, it was my great aim. It turned out to be beautiful.
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
Just opened up the freezer to find chocolate penis popsicles. Too hungover for this shit
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
Randomize
