Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
Is that you who's passed out on my treadmill?
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
Weight watchers just said "you've tracked beer three times recently, want to make it one of your favorites?" I'm begining to understand why I needed to go in the first place.
Sitting in my junior high parking lot high on ambien talking to a stranger I met on tinder. What is life?
Randomize
