You were telling me about how you were gonna marry him, have his children and name them all woodchip.
Just threw up at the table during our Father's Day dinner. And I managed to get quite a bit on dad, so that was nice.
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
we need to open a bar. a bar with... wait for it... A FUCKING BALL PIT.
LOL. Do you guys need a ride home?
No. we're home already. i just thought it was a brilliant fucking idea.
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
Randomize